We enjoy receiving e-mail questions about the “what” and the “whys” behind what we chose as a family. We enjoy it, in great measure, because we too have gained and continue to gain so much by talking through things and gleaning from others who have gone before us.
It is wise to think through convictions that may be different from our non-Christian backgrounds or our culturally influenced point of view.
When we sense that something is “off” it is good to pause, but it is even better to question and keep questioning until we arrive at Scripture to back up what we believe. It is critical to develop an understanding of what we are choosing and why.
Because if we don't do this work of gaining understanding we will soon simply let go of our convictions and go with the flow.
It is just easier. But easier rarely equals better. We must gain an understanding of our whys and then renew our minds with these reasons.
"My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you,
turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding,
and if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding,and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure,then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God.For the LORD gives wisdom,and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding."~Proverbs 2:4-6
GIVING UNDERSTANDING TO OUR CHILDREN
We must know why we are choosing what we are choosing in media and otherwise from God’s Word. As we continually gain understanding and renew our minds we are kept on course.
More quickly than we can believe, it is time to share that understanding with our children. Our goal, as our children mature, is to transition from discipline into a godly understanding.
“A rod is for is the back of him that is void of understanding.” Proverbs 10:13
While it is true that there will be times that we will have to tell our children that we cannot explain something to them at that moment, it should not be the norm. We should make it our habit explain ourselves. If we want to pass on our convictions and help our children from growing in bitterness towards us, we need to lovingly explain our “whys.”
Listen to this quote by Dr. S.M. Davis. He is speaking to the 13 year old, but of course we know that if we do not begin explaining ourselves at a much earlier age, by the time our child is 13, he will not have ears to hear. This word is for all of us.
“Your child’s getting older. He’s 13 now. He comes in and says to you, “I want to go to the skating rink Friday night.”
And you say, “No. You’re not going there.”
He says, “Why?”
“Because I said so, that’s why!”
“Now that might work for Friday night this year, but it probably won’t work for Friday night 5 or 10 years from now.
If you have a conviction about the music that will be played at the rink and the people who are going to be at the rink and the atmosphere that is created at the rink, then you better explain that carefully, and tenderly and lovingly with Scripture to back you up so this child has a basis for understanding not just what they are doing but why they are doing it.
Not only does that young man need to understand why for that particular decision, he’s also going to need those same principles, same beliefs and same convictions for a bunch of other decisions that he will need to make that you may not know anything about.”
SM DAVIS, How to Pass Convictions on to Your Children, Chapter 7
Understanding accomplishes many needful things, but one of its most important roles may be to strengthen us. As we are challenged and must seek God’s Truth, our understanding grows and our resolve is continually fortified. This is a good thing.
Understanding why we choose what we choose can make all the difference.
Photos: A day set aside to make caramel apples. We thought it would be fun to add more than just caramel to them~ and it was! The girls really enjoyed "decorating" them most of all. They were very yummy, very sticky and delightfully fall. : )