Wednesday, October 3, 2012

IS THAT THE GOAL?





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IS THAT THE GOAL?



Like dark clouds looming on the horizon, cookie season was fast approaching.

I was a Girl Scout.

No, I should rephrase that.  I was actually a crummy Girl Scout.

As a little scout, my main duties seemed to be to attend meetings, earn patches and- once a year to sell as many cookie boxes as I could.  But--  I never seemed to earn that many patches and I really, really hated selling cookies.

A lot of the girls were good at it.  They'd get extra large patches to put on their sashes demonstrating the amazing amount of cookies they were able to sell, but I never got one of those.

I think I was just way too shy to stand up and talk about new skills that deserved a patch or go door to door to sell cookies. 

So, while I loved seeing my friends at the meetings, the rest of it felt like a big flop to me.   




Little me.



Then one day as a good friend of mine was walking me part way home from a meeting she told me in a special, confiding, starry eyed sort of way that we could go on being Girl Scouts forever.  We could be Girl Scouts through Jr. High and in High School and then grow up to be leaders of our own troops someday.


My jaw dropped.  Is that the goal?  I never really thought how long this torture could last!  

I know- who thinks that about Girl Scouts?


And just like that I realized the direction I was headed was toward a goal that was not mine and my interest in Girl Scouting just kind of dissipated.   

Maybe you've had that happen.  It might be that you meet someone who demonstrates the end result of some philosophy you have been following, but when you see the eventual fruit you realize-  oops.  That's not my goal.  And you feel like it's time to get on another road. 

And sometimes it doesn't mean something as radical as switching roads- especially if you got on this road after much thought and prayer- but it may mean tweaking the compass a bit.





Our littles.




THIS IS NOT THE GOAL


While building our home in the country, we were living in a camper.  I remember one day my mom had come to visit us.  

My mom is some kind of wonderful.  She is always on board with whatever crazy thing we are up to (although the living in a camper and building our own home thing was a little bit of a stretch for her).

She has never batted an eye as our family has grown and changed.  She just prayed for us daily.  I want to be that kind of mother in law someday too.

I remember after her visit, we went inside and closed the camper door.  I was feeling happy and blessed as one of my older daughters, who was about seven, looked up at me and said:


"Grammie is worldly, isn't she?"  The disappointment was evident.

"Why do you say that?" I responded. 

"Well- she does have more than one earring in each ear."



My jaw dropped.  This is not the goal.  I could see very clearly the fruit I had been cultivating.  Her Grammie was a sweet, Christian woman who had driven two hours to visit us and what was her little granddaughter concerned about?  Her earrings.  

One too many to be exact.    


All my work to set up rules seemed to be staring me in the face.  Of course, I wanted this little one to embrace our views- even our likes and dislikes.  And she was anxious to jump on board.  But I had created rules without also explaining Christian liberty.  

So our rules-- the extra biblical standards about dress and nail polish (or lack thereof at the time);  our rules about music, books and jewelry they were not just rules for us-  they were becoming rules for everyone.  

And anyone who didn't know our rules or was just a little different was going to be doing it wrong.  No matter how much they loved and obeyed Christ.  








LOVE IS THE GOAL


So, I had to ask myself.  What is the goal?

I knew this was about a lot more than earrings.  

It was time to teach that love is first. 


Love.

Not earrings.  

Not nail polish.  

Not this doll or that one.  

Not pants vs. skirts.  

Love is the goal.



One person considers one day more sacred than another; another considers every day alike. Each of them should be fully convinced in their own mind. Whoever regards one day as special does so to the Lord. Whoever eats meat does so to the Lord, for they give thanks to God; and whoever abstains does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God. For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. For this very reason, Christ died and returned to life so that he might be the Lord of both the dead and the living.

You, then, why do you judge your brother or sister? Or why do you treat them with contempt? For we will all stand before God’s judgment seat.

Romans 14:5-10







May you be blessed as you love,










8 comments:

  1. Wow Rebecca, you just spelled it all out, everything we talked about the past few days, perfectly summed up in this post. This concept is so easily forgotten as we zealously discover a new rule to follow, a new standard we think is best, but to remember the love and Grace daily given us from our Lord... that is what we need to continue to pray for and to re-read Romans 14 often, as you ended your post with.
    LOVED seeing you this past week Rebecca, LOVE YOU!

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  2. I love you, Susie! And I love how whenever we connect it is like we are in the same place- being grown and stretched in similar areas. LOVED seeing you this past week too! How sweet you were to zip out here on a plane to bless Liz. You blessed me too. :)

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    1. Ive seen pics of your mum now and little Hayley, and you all look like your own individual selves, but in that photo its amazing how your mum looks like you and you (if thats you at the front) look like Hayley!!!!!

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  3. Rebecca,

    This post really made me smile. Honestly it was a bit *freeing* for me!! To finally come to the conculsion that girl scouts might not be for every little girl is huge! lol When I think back to my short time as a "brownie" I feel my stomach tighten up and I even cringe a little bit. To this day I still remember how much anxiety I had about having to go door to door to sell those cookies! The other little girls would gush about how many cookies they had sold and how much fun they had in process and I would think "what is wrong with me"....or "why can't I just be more like them"! I am turning 30 this month and I am STILL coming around to the fact that it's okay if I am shy and reserved - especially around people I have never met! So the story you shared really spoke to my heart today! :)

    I hope you don't mind me asking, but I have noticed in some of your pictures that you have beautiful white kitchen cabinets. Do you still love them as much as when you first moved in? The only reason I ask is because we are having a house built right now and I am going back and forth about our kitchen cabinets. I have always thought white cabinets were so beautiful - but are they hard to keep clean? Does the paint chip easily? All I have ever known is stained cabinets..so this is a whole new world for me! :) I would love to hear from someone who actually has them, which I why I am coming to you. Plus, like us, you have a lots of daughters who enjoy helping mama in the kitchen!!

    Hope you all are having a wonderful Friday!
    Blessings,
    Kelly

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  4. Thank you for this post, Mrs. Jones. We've just started memorizing Romans 14 in church and I've been thinking about this very topic. It's easy to forget that just because a rule I've made is good for me doesn't mean it's good for everyone. It's far more important to love our brothers and sisters in Christ. I think that if we focus on God in our conversations and on what He's done for us the other details and differences in our lives will become irrelevant. The mercy and grace of God is so great we won't have time to wonder why other families aren't following the same "rules" we are.
    Thank you again for this post. I enjoyed seeing all the pictures my mom took of her trip. I miss your family.

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  5. I never thought about Hailey looking much like me- how fun! It could be the chubby cheeks! ;)



    Kelly- How funny! My little sister who was so different than me (bold and fearless) would go to the door sometimes and ask. It was still all very stressful to me. :)

    I think the finish on the cabinets is called Thermafoil- it's a baked on plastic like coating? The maker of the cabinets is Merillat. It holds up really well to little hands helping wipe them down with wet cleaning rags. We've had them six years and are very happy with them.



    Abbey- That is a fantastic passage to memorize! We miss you too! I know you are being productive there but wish we could have seen you too. The girls and I loved your pictures of England. We all laughed at the "probably" ad. :)

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  6. Hey Rebecca- I have missed you! OO to sit and drink tea on the porch with you.. :-D Thank you for your words! Hope all is well!

    ((HUGS)) Kelly K

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  7. That sounds wonderful, Kelly! Make mine Good Earth Sweet and Spicy. That's my favorite. :)

    Hugs right back my friend!

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