CHOOSING JOY {and kicking worry to the curb}

Joy is the serious business of heaven.

  ~ C. S. Lewis  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

Joy may be the serious business of heaven, but it's also the serious business of kids. 

 

Children have this amazing tunnel vision, like blinders on a horse, that block so much of what could be heavy from their sight. 

 

This December Tom's business brought us down south to Los Angeles and Santa Monica the week before Christmas (crazy timing!).  And I have to say that what made our time so enjoyable was watching our children experience joy.   

 

While they were excitedly putting their hands in the handprints of Bing Crosby in front of Grumman's Chinese Theater, I was of course panicking on the inside about germs and kidnappers.  And while they were being tussled and splashed by waves at the beach, I was counting heads, fretting about drowning and sharks (don't worry, it was a dolphin!).  Ya, I'm a real blast at parties too.  

 

As moms some worry is just going to be carried on our shoulders so our kids can be kids- and that's a good thing, but studies have shown that most of our worries are simply baseless. 

 

The truth is, where people wrote down their worries over a two week period, not only did the things people worry about not happen, but 85% of the time what actually happened was positive instead!

 

In other words, we worry most about things that won't ever be a problem.  And that can be a problem.  Worry is a joy stealer.  It's time to pay attention to when we worry and if it's not productive stuff, kick it to the curb!   

 

We worry about the news, the elections, what will happen now that the elections are over, what people think of us and so on only to arrive later to find that none of the terrible things we fretted about happened at all but we had wasted moments that could have been joyful. 

 

God says worry won't change a thing- at least it won't change things for the good (Psalm 37:1-11).

But joy.  Joy is an amazing force.  Joy comes from focusing on what God has done and is doing.  It's being grateful for the specific things God has sovereignly placed in our journey (writing them down is a great idea!).  Joy comes from keeping our eyes on Christ and trusting Him for the future.  These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be full.  -John 15:11

 

That doesn't mean we will always feel joyful- it can be a real job to analyze and refocus our thoughts!  But making joy the business of our homes will help us to experience little slivers of heaven here on earth.  Cultivating joy is like taping the fountain of youth.  I can only imagine how it makes our Heavenly Father feel to see us resting in His care and doing cartwheels in our hearts over the blessings He has given us.      

 

In our home we have tried different things to encourage our hearts toward joy.  One thing we did last winter was create a big "Gratitude Attitude" poster board where we each wrote down one thing a day we were grateful for.  People remember what they do (write, say etc.) so this was a good way to choose joy and kick worry to the curb for us.  I think I'm ready to do this again!  What are some ways you choose joy in your home? 

 

 

It's the simple stuff that we sometimes forget: "...warm air in our home, Lydia's help finding puppy, humor, a mom and dad that love us, sunshine, our church, sleep..."

 

I will meditate on all Your work and muse on Your deeds.  -Psalm 77:12 

 

 

 

   

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Rebecca Jones is a believer on Christ, passionate about God's Word and applying it to life.  She and her High School sweetheart have been married for 25 years and have 5 daughters (yes 5!).  Rebecca has a degree in Marketing, has been home educating for 15 years and writing since 2008.  Her oldest daughter is presently attending a Christian college while the other 4 daughters continue to school at home. 

 

 

 

PARENTING IN THE TEEN ZONE

Faith was accepted to a local Christian college.  I'll have to share more about that soon.

“To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven.” 

~ Ecclesiastes 3:1

If you would have told me that life could get busier with Faithie graduating High School and starting college, I wouldn't have believed it.  I was pretty sure that I was as busy as I was going to get.  But the truth is, as I have ventured into a new season with three teen girls at home, I am busier!

God, in His wisdom, has created seasons for us.  Seasons in nature, seasons in ministry work and seasons within the family.  

When I had a houseful of little ones, I have to admit that I was a little fearful of the next season.  I was enjoying this time of cuddling up for read alouds, baking cookies and facing hurts that could simply be kissed away.  I wanted to ignore the next season...  maybe it wouldn't happen (fingers crossed). 

The teenage years seemed to loom ahead, like the Bermuda Triangle, where all sorts of families go in but not all families come out.  The "Teen Zone."  Creepy-- and no thanks! 

But of course, this was spring thinking.  I was in that first season of parenting and let's be honest, it is just hard to see life as being better than spring when we have only experienced spring.  New babies and fresh tasks are exciting things that fill us with hope and passion.  Seeing little inklings of life pushing up through the soil can be so thrilling, but God intends us to enjoy the pleasure of fruit that is still to come!  And you don't pick fruit in the spring. 

CONTROL IS NOT THE GOAL

In hindsight, I wonder now if part of the fear I felt about moving into the "Teen Zone" was the idea of not having control.  I know that wasn't the entire picture, but when children are little we mommies have a lot of control.  We train our little ones to come when we call, to wear the clothes we want them to wear and to do what we want them to do.  That is good.  That is proper in the spring.  Its also easy- once the training is done anyway.  But having parental control is not the final goal. 

I am sure you watch people like I do.  You've met parents who want to stay in that place of control forever.  Their child is twenty something and they are still telling them (arguing with them over) what movies to watch, what clothes to wear and when to go to bed.  And by doing so, they fail to launch themselves and their charges into the next season.  The sad truth is, that rarely ends well.

Then there are other parents who may also want to stay in the season of spring, and seem to launch or check out way too early, focusing instead on other "spring" projects that bring them the excitement parenting used to.  They go completely hands off with their teens as they focus their attention elsewhere.  That also usually spells trouble.

The goal is not that we will have absolute control over our charges, or that we will have no input in their discipleship, but that we keep pointing them to Christ.  We continue to walk with them, desiring that our children be constrained by the Holy Spirit, not by us. 

The Jews who were without the Spirit required law to constrain them.  And even that law was not enough.  But the Believer in Christ has the Spirit, Who is called the Restrainer to guide and direct him.   

Parental control is not the goal, Holy Spirit control is.

ESTABLISHING CHRIST AS THE AUTHORITY

I find that inasmuch as we made the aim in our home to establish Christ and His Word as the ultimate authority, we have been thankful.

We have had to make a few tweaks here and there over the years, steering away from "we say so" to, "Well, what does the Word say?"

We have had to be willing to lay down pet doctrines that could not be supported by Scripture.  And in laying them down, God has grown us in grace as well.

We have chosen to make concessions over little things-  to shrug off a pair of jeans with a cosmetic hole or an old t-shirt; to say ok to a movie that may not be our favorite style (thank you, Dove Reviews and VidAngel!) and to learn to make recommendations to our older children. 

This doesn't mean that the teens just have free reign so to speak, but we are transitioning into the summer season of life, where the older ones are reading a movie review and telling us that they don't want to watch something that doesn't champion biblical principles, and so on.  It's becoming an internal constraint and not a fight against parental law. 

We are doing our best, God helping us, to treat our young adults with respect.  And they have continued to treat us in kind, considering our desires and feelings over their own. 

We have simply not found that we need to rant over movies, clothing choices and bedtimes.  But we have also found that we need not go against our consciences. 

It is a sweet season.

Little Lyddie is 10.

Michaela is 16.

Sarah turns 14 next month and the countdown is on over here!

 

Hailey is 7-- can you believe it?

Faith is 18.

In the season of spring, our children were nourished by the pure milk of the Word, and now they have matured, they are ready for meat.  We are so thankful to get to be the ones to hash things out with them.  That was always the goal.

Even Faith comes home from college ready to talk through the issues of the day and we ask one another, "Well, what does the Word say?" pretty much every night.   

Now I don't want to give the impression things are perfect.  They are not because we are not.  But the "Teen Zone" hasn't been nearly as scary as we once thought.  In fact, I think we are going to live to tell about it!  



Blessings friends,



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Have you tried VidAngel yet?  We love it.  :)

WINTER CAMP IN!

Winter "camp in" date:  S'mores Ingredients, Movie, Homemade Cookies for Pa, Air Mattress, sleeping bags and PJ's.

You've heard me talk about our camp ins for years, right? 

Camp ins are like a camp out, but without the outside (a personal plus in my book!). 

We love having them anytime, but we started to especially enjoy them while prepping for Christmas.  Unfortunately, with all the sickness, we missed doing it at Christmas this year, so we rescheduled for this weekend. 

The kids were so excited.  It means all sleeping together in one room Little House on the Prairie style, watching movies and eating s'mores.  Easy peasy on the parents and super fun for the kids.

 

 

Indoor s'mores cooker-- from the thrift store for under $5.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Everyone had so much fun, we decided to camp in two nights in a row!

Blessings,

 

 

_________________________

Avoiding dirt since 2008-- Our first camp in.  :)

 

DOES GOD CARE ABOUT WHAT WE THINK?

I can't believe it's Back to School time already!

 

 

RIGHT THINKING MATTERS 

 

I just want to say from the start, this isn't a post to add one more burden for anyone to carry.  The point is not that we won't make mistakes in our thinking but that there are times I buzz through life with the false impression that my thinking is inconsequential to some degree.  

Maybe you do too. 

We know that God cares about what we do; how we treat others, spend our time, abilities and resources.  And we know He cares about what we say (our words are to encourage, exhort and so on), but have you given much consideration to the idea that God cares about what we think? 

 

 

 

 

 

Back to school packs.  Each kiddo had their own color.  And a chocolate.  Because
really-- everything is better with chocolate, right?

 

GOOD-BYE STINKIN’ THINKIN’

Recently, I have been reading a lot of verses that have reminded me that our thinking matters.  

Before we were believers, we had a different way of thinking.

Ephesians 4:17-18 says that we are commanded to no longer walk or even think as the Gentiles.

 “no longer walk as the Gentiles also walk, in the vanity of their mind, being darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance in them, because of the hardening of their heart.” 

Our thoughts are new, just like our hearts.  And when they are not, we have a new pattern of how to deal with those thoughts. 

Getting our hands dirty harvesting the last of the garden spoils.

 

 

 

We learn (with ever so much trial along the way) to “bring every thought captive into the obedience of Christ” (2 Cor. 10:5).

We push out ungodly thoughts and worldview to have “the mind of Christ” (1 Cor. 2:16).

And we make provision to grow in our discernment and understanding (Phil. 1:9).

 

 

All packed and ready for a last little slice of summer-- a day at the lake.

 

 

Yes, God cares about what we think.  I guess that we should too. 

 

 

We had a private beach for hours to play and rest.

 

 

DAVID HAD RIGHT THINKING 

As I have been meditating on the Psalms the past few weeks, I have been so very encouraged  reading David.  Sometimes I think that he has a much clearer view of God as his Father than I do.

Tada!  Sister love.  They played for hours in the lake.

 

 

David’s enemies were ungodly.  That didn’t mean they didn’t go to temple, but  they were slick-talking, self-promoting and vile.  They exposed their own lack of faithfulness with throats that were like an “open tomb” Psalm 5:9. 

 

As a side note, just think about the purpose of the tombs in David’s day.  Remember, they conveniently kept the stink in (John 11:39).  There was deadness and decay inside and people wanted to keep that stench contained.  If only the sharp tongued men who attacked David had a stone placed over their mouths.

 

Smiling at my honey (see me in his glasses?)

 

 

 

But this is really about how David responded when he was literally run out of town by these men, led by his own son Absalom. 

You remember that Absalom had covertly worked to turn hearts against David and toward himself.  He seemed proud to "make a name for himself" like the ungodly men from Tower of Babel.

David's life was turned completely upside down as he was forced to flee far from his home; was cursed by men who misunderstood him and heard the people say, "There is no help for him in God (Psalm 3:2)."

 

 

 

 

Dog surfer by Michaela.

 

 

David, while running from their traitorous hands cries to the LORD: 

 

“But You, O Lord, are a shield for me,

My glory and the One who lifts up my head.

I cried to the Lord with my voice,

And He heard me from His holy hill.”

- Psalm 3:3-4

 

This is right thinking. 

 

 

 

Faithie soaking up the heat and the chance to read.

 

David set his mind on truth.  While others said he was without hope, David rightly believed that God heard his cry and was the lifter of his head. 

 

I am a head lifter.  As parents, we all have opportunities to lift up little downcast heads, don't we?  When a little someone has had their feelings hurt by others, it is our love relationship with that little one, that allows us to lift their little head; look in their eyes; dispel their fears and comfort their heart.  

And David knew that God is our Father in that way.  He is the lifter of our heads. 

 



I love this man like crazy.  We just celebrated 23 years of marriage.

 

 

 Later David said: 

“But let all those rejoice who put their

Trust in You;

Let them ever shout for joy, because

You defend them;

Let those also who love Your name

Be joyful in You.

For You, O Lord, will bless the righteous;

With favor You will surround him as

With a shield.”

- Psalm 5:11-12

 

 

Goodbye sweet Summer...

 

 

David asked that all of those who trust in GOD (that is you and me!) would rejoice, shout and be joyful!  Not because we won't face trials, but because GOD Himself is our shield!   And we can't get a better deal than that.

We know that God has fought for us in the past.  We have seen His faithful hand extended to us.  Remembering those truths and having patterns of thankfulness.

That is right thinking.
 

 

It's been great to visit on the porch with dear long-time friends.

 

 

 

David had it right. 

 

Paul had it right.

 

And they not only remind us of right thinking, but also tell us to protect that right thinking from the crafty and persuasive words of men (Col. 2:4) as we are rooted and built up in Him (Col. 2:6).

 

 

 

Friend love.

Is the way we think really such a big deal?  I guess it is because God placed a warning sign up for us to read in His Word. 

It starts as all serious warning signs do-- with the strong declaration of "BEWARE":

"Beware lest anyone cheat you

through philosophy and empty deceit,

according to the tradition of men,

according to the basic principles of the world

and not according to Christ,

 

 For in Him dwells all the fullness of

the Godhead bodily;

and you are complete in Him,

who is the head of all principality and power."

 

- Colossians 2:8-9

 

 



Unless we guard right thinking, we will be cheated.

Back to School we go!

 

 

 

 

As we get back into schooling our children, or in some cases as we send them to school, right thinking is something worth our attention. 

 

 

 

Dr. Greg Bahnsen, writes in his book, Always Ready:

 

 

 

'"All the treasures of wisdom and knowledge are hid in Christ (Col. 2:3-8).'  Note he says all wisdom and knowledge is deposited in the person of Christ- whether it be about the War of 1812, water's chemical composition, the literature of Shakespeare, or the laws of logic! 

 

Every academic pursuit and every thought must be related to Jesus Christ, for Jesus is the way, the truth and the life (John 14:6)."  p. 4-5

 

 

 

 

As we read the headlines, study academics, interact socially, we have so many opportunities to filter those things through the protective screen of God's Word.   

 

May we clearly show our little ones that all thinking and all wisdom relates back to the One Who made us, sustains us and lifts our troubled heads.

 

What are ways that you are proactively protecting right thinking and growing in discernment?   

 

Because right thinking matters.

 

 

 

May you be blessed!

 

 

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Have High Schoolers this year?  Consider having them read Always Ready by Greg Bahnsen and When People are Big and God is Small!